Yes, I went to church for Ash Wednesday. No, the walls did not start bleeding.
I'm not big on the Church and organized religion, although I most definitely pray and believe in God and do actually enjoy attending Mass. (Are you uncomfortable yet? Sorry. Bear with me.)
So, I went to church for the first time in almost a year, took communion, and went home with the biggest, darkest cross on my forehead ever. And somewhere in there, I half listened to the priest (I was at the back, the PA system was so-so and I had to strain to hear him) and half meditated on how giving up soda for Lent was not really a great sacrifice. Although I did reason that I could take the money I spend on soda, set is aside, and use it toward something more meaningful. You think 40 days worth of soda money won't make a difference? People, you don't know how bad my addiction is.
And then I took no end of crap for doing all of that.
See, I haven't been to confession in, um, oh...Let's just say I was probably in junior high. And being the goody-goody I was, I'm sure the worst offense I had to offer up was some smack-talk about another girl. Point is, I've racked up some decent sins since then and have yet to formally ask a priest to make sure I'm good with God. And did I mention I am NOT a regular church goer? I mean, I end up going for Christmas and/or Easter, maybe another random trip in there somewhere, and then maybe a wedding that includes a mass. And even then I'm checking out the groomsmen and counting down to the cocktail hour, not thinking about God and sacraments and whatever.
So here's my question: am I a bad person for treating the Catholic faith like a buffet? You know, picking and choosing what I want, rejecting the not-so-fun parts? Or is it good enough that I at least acknowledge my hypocrisy, try to be a good person and basically use this blog as a confessional?
And if everyone agrees I need to get myself to a confessional booth, don't blame ME when the priest freaks out after I go all Jack Donaghy on him.
Stone away.
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3 comments:
Here's what I think: Youre going to hell! Save me a seat!
No seriously.... I think you (and myself) are probably in the majority when it comes to "practicing" our faith/religion. I am exactly like you in that I do not go to church, but I believe in God. I think growing up and attending Catholic schools through high school have jaded me. The chuch is a bit behind the times in their beliefs and methods of teaching. I am ok with the beliefs but I truly believe that current times call for modification and we as individuals must make it work for us first. I have faith. I believe. I do not think I need to be in a church to pray.
I am currently wrestling with this. My boys are in CCD. I am not the best example of a practicing catholic. Im not even in the top 10. Do I start going to church for them? How important is it these days to have some faith?
I will totally save you a seat in hell!
I know my mom wrestled with this when I was born, which is why I was TWO YEARS OLD by the time I was baptized. Catholic school kind of messed me up in a weird way: you're telling me divorce is a sin, yet have no problem cashing my divorced mom's tuition check? Interesting. So yeah, I have issues with the hypocrisy and the outdated teachings (ie birth control, homosexuality), but also realize that I am not perfect. Then again, I don't claim to be.
As a parent today (not that I have to worry about this, but maybe one day?), how do you reconcile sending your kids to CCD or a religious school, yet not really abiding by the strictest teachings? Crazy stuff.
While I can not speak for others, obviously, my intent is to use the CCD classes as a starting point. I hope my kids are learning about the religion and I can then use the information and continue it. I have done a crappy job of introducing the churh to them and though I dont follow to the letter, I do believe there is a happy middle ground to stand on.
The problem I was having was explaining concepts such as rising from the dead, the body and blood of Christ etc. Not easy to do when kids usually take things so literally.
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