What to Wear Wednesday: Purse Splurge

This week Kristle has a question about one of my very favorite things: purses.

"I need some help with a decision. I need a new purse and I love this one:

You think it is too much? I usually buy $50 purses. It will be my daily purse. I have seen it in stores so it is a good size and black works with all."

Let me start off here by saying that my first thought when I saw a picture of this lovely bag was, "I want to take this behind a middle school and get it pregnant." Holy mother of accessories! We have a winner!

It's such a stereotype of the Typical Woman, isn't it? We're just mad for bags and shoes and we'll take out a second mortgage to finance these addictions, right? No. Most of us are reasonable and will not sell organs in the name of a pretty bag.

That said, I say go for it. You are planning to get this bag on eBay for a relative steal. You have seen it in person, liked it, and knew it was your style. You don't own upwards of 10 bags (unlike someone who shall remain CKD) and would like to upgrade your accessory wardrobe. You plan to use it daily, which would break down the cost-per-use to mere pennies, really.

I know that purchasing a purse for roughly double what you would normally pay sounds insane. You have a functional day-to-day bag, there's not an urgent "need" for this, and who the hell is spluring on things like this NOW? THE ECONOMY IS IN SHAMBLES! QUICK, PUT THE MONEY UNDER THE MATTRESS!!!! But hear me out: if you have budgeted for such a purchase, and are maybe willing to sacrifice some other fun things that may pop up for a bit, there's no harm really. This is generally a good way to roll, regardless of the economic climate or threat of layoffs. If this will not make-or-break your ability to eat or pay bills you shouldn't feel awful. Another way to make sure you won't regret a big impulse buy is to sleep on it; if you are still thinking about the item the next day, you know it wasn't temporary insanity. If waiting isn't an option, keep the tags, keep the receipt and know the return policy BEFORE you hand over your money.

And I can totally borrow this bag when I come visit right?

UPDATE: Kristle bid on the purse and won it! All is happy in Accessory Land. PS: I had a lot of sake tonight.

What to Wear Wednesday: Not-So-Shiny But Still Happy People

This week's question comes from Miz Literature:

"I have a problem with 'shine.' Do you know of any products that will help me keep a matte look all day?"

Dear Miz Lit,

Without a little more info on your current product usage, I'm going to start from the basics and work our way up. This might be a case of "less is more" as opposed to adding layers to your gorgeous face.

Shine is usually a problem for the oily or combination skinned people of the world, but you should still be using a moisturizer every day. Use an oil-free one (Neutrogena has fantastic options, and it's easy to get one with basic SPF protection) to keep your skin balanced and avoid extra shine.

In terms of make-up, there are several options. I wouldn't do ALL of these things at once, but some experimenting might be in order to find the right solution.

I like the Smashbox Photo Finish primer before applying anything to my face. It mattifies (Is that a word? We'll say it is.) before you put on your make-up and is clear, so no need to spend hours matching colors. Who has that kind of time? It works well under foundation, powder, whatever...and helps your make-up stay put so you don't need to reapply throughout the day.

If you like foundation, I am a big fan of mineral make-up. Two excellent brands to try: Bare Escentuals (sort of the Big Name in mineral make-up) and Jane Iredale (my current love). Both offer excellent coverage without creating a "mask" effect. Bonus: you don't really need to do the foundation/powder combo. Since I am the laziest person on the planet, I am all about eliminating steps so that I can move on to my favorite morning activity: getting some coffee. Anyway, this stuff stays on all day (even during Chico summers when it's 145 degrees) and keeps the shine at bay.

Not feeling the mineral foundation? Sue Devitt makes a wonderful liquid foundation that goes on like buttah.

Not really into foundation? This brings us to...

Dr. Feelgood. I. Love. This. Stuff.

I have singled it out as a favorite thing and I pretty much always have it on me. Works beautifully alone, under foundation or as shine control hours after you first applied your make-up. No need to match colors and you can apply it while driving to work (not that I have EVER done that) because there's really no precision involved. If you go for the Sue Devitt foundation and find you are still a little shiny, this is the perfect thing to layer over it for a quick touch-up.

Have fun playing around at the various make-up counters and best of luck in your quest to let your adorable personality be the only shiny thing about you!

What to Wear Wednesday: Special Double Issue

Today we have TWO questions and since I feel like an ass for making people wait, I'll address them both in one post. We'll call it a "Hotties from Pasadena" special edition if you will.

Our first question is from KB:

"When is it appropriate to wear brown and black together? I seem to scoff whenever I see them together."

I have never really been a fan of mixing black and brown. Call me a rule-follower or unimaginative, but I couldn't quite wrap my head around a way to mix the two but still create a cohesive outfit. BUT! My friend Roadtripper got me hooked on a fabulous fashion blog: http://whatiwore2day.blogspot.com/ and she has included some photos and examples of how she pulls this off. (Sidenote: I fully realize I am cribbing info from someone else, but I am also CREDITING the original artist like a good little English major so back off, OK?)

Here are some photos of how Kasmira, the author, mixes black and brown. While these outfits may not be everyone's cup of tea, I give her credit for linking the colors through accessories and managing to look purposeful rather than haphazard. It seems like you need to have a base, black OR brown, and then add accessories in the other color, and THEN a pop of something else just to keep yourself from being too boring. If you give it a whirl, send me some tips and photos!

Question #2 comes from Auditing Your Outfit and it is a doozy, kids.

"So my question does not pertain to fashion advice for myself (although I could definitely use it), but how to approach and solve the issues of others. And by others I do not mean the people I like to gawk at in Starbucks or at the grocery store. I mean those in my office. A place of business. A conservative corporate giant where it is supposed to be an honor to work (or something like that). All of these people have a college eduction, some even have a masters or a law degree. But for whatever reason, they cannot fathom that it is inappropriate to:

1) Wear pants that are a good inch too short (with white sport socks, sometimes)
2) Rock the camel-toe as though their names are actually Annie
3) Dress as though they can go directly from work to the club with ease
4) Sport 2-3 inches of cleavage (and still wonder why people don't look at thier face in meetings)

5) Appear in apparal my mother (or grandmother actually) would have been wearing circa 1986 (not in a cool retro way, let's not give people the benefit of the doubt here)

Those are the top 5.

Now I am not saying that its not okay to have commited one of the aforementioned offenses. It is NOT okay that committing the offenses is the norm rather than exception to the rule. It is an accounting firm people. Don't show up to work in an outfit that you stole from the set of Flashdance and think people are going to take you seriously in a meeting. Save that for when I see you at Starbucks or the grocery store. How, oh how do I even tell these people they are so so wrong? Please help."

Oh Auditing... It's like we work at the same place! Chico is a very casual, laid-back town and our entire campus reflects that vibe but damn, some people really take it to an extreme. Shorts and flip-flops are not the way to go when you work in an office. People use the hot summer weather as an excuse or claim comfort, but I am a firm believer that a skirt and nice sandals are just as comfy, cool and likely more flattering. And, you know, WORK APPROPRIATE.

We have a couple of issues going on here: inappropriate attire vs straight up fugly. Let's address the former first.

If someone who reports to you is dressing inappropriately (too casual, too revealing, whatever), pulling him or her aside for a little chat is fine. Or, you can have HR do your dirty work for you: a well-crafted memo reminding people of What is Acceptable and What is Not OK might help kick some butts into professional gear. Specific examples work here (mentioning cleavage, short skirts, etc) and you don't need to run around talking to everyone individually. And if you have an actual dress code for your office/corporation, post it or attach it to the memo. A procedure can be enforced. Bonus: YOU are not the Bad Cop. It's The Man keeping everyone down.

Now for the problem of bad taste. Yeah, if people are dressing within the confines of what is technically acceptable, but are doing so poorly (ie a suit with shoulder pads) there isn't much you can do unless you just want to start calling people out. Note: I am not really opposed to this, just not sure if you want to be known as the Style Police. If you are friends with one of the offenders, invite her to lunch near a store with some cute outfits in the window. Stop in front of the store and INSIST you go in and have her try something on. Rave about how freaking adorable she is until she buys it. Compliment the improvements to the wardrobe and point out flattering pieces.

I did this with a co-worker and there has been a marked improvement in her daily wear. Sure, she sometimes wears black pants with white socks and brown shoes (for reals) BUT more often than not she's looking more polished and like she put a little thought into her look. True story.
Sometimes a little positive reinforcement goes further than telling people they look like shit. Best of luck!

This Is a Crappy Excuse for a Post but I'm Taking All Kinds of Hell for My Hiatus

Hey Interweb...what's happening? (Say that like Bill in Office Space.) Apparently people actually read this thing because I have taken some crap for not updating the last couple of days. Um, sorry? Mama killed some brain cells this weekend and is planning to do an Afterschool Special/Very Special Episode-type of post COMPLETE WITH PHOTOS as soon as said pictures are procured. Hang in there - evidence of the full powers of my jackassery will be here soon.

In the meantime, here are some deep thoughts for you:

-I read this: http://www.whiskeymarie.com/2009/01/whats-wrong-with-me-part-7463.html and pretty much lost my shit because I play this same game ALL THE TIME. Meetings, the grocery store, coffee shop, random cocktail party: it's a sickness. But apparently someone else suffers from it so at least I'm not alone in the crazy. So, you know...good for me? I think? Anyone else out there want to cop to this kind of insanity?

-When did CSU Hayward become CSU East Bay? That's weird.

-It has come to my attention that after exhausting the armed forces I am now just collecting The Village People. The Indian Chief is going to be a challenge but I think I'm up for it.

-Don't you love those days when you kind of threw together an outfit and didn't really have time to do anything with your hair (which is an out of control mess anyway and probably beyond help) and yet people stop you in the hallway to say you look cute? Because I fucking love those days.

What to Wear Wednesday: Eyeliner How-To

My very first question comes from "Tammy F" in Minnesota:

"Okay... my first question... eyeliner.. whats the best way to apply it without making you look like a hooker?"

Hi Tammy!

This question could not be more perfect! I have struggled with eyeliner for years. Make-up people at every counter always want to put it on me and it ends up looking too severe, too raccoon-like. Not really the look you or I want to rock. Lately I've been experimenting a bit and have found a few variables help you stay on the right side of sexy.

Usually one of the first mistakes with eyeliner is color selection. Even applied perfectly, the wrong color is going to be horribly unflattering. Black is incredibly harsh for most people and can actually make your eyes look smaller, not bigger. Knowing you and your coloring, I'd opt for brown or even a deep plum. Dark greens can be pretty, too, as long as they aren't too yellow. I recommend Clinique's True Khaki; it comes with a blending spongey thingy on the other end to help correct mistakes. Perfect for an eyeliner novice! You want the eyeliner to complement your eyeshadow palette, so choose accordingly.

Now for the application: I learned this trick from Carmindy on What Not to Wear and oh sweet Lord, it works! Hold your eyelid taut. Start at the outer corner, and work your way in. BUT! Don't try to draw one, long, straight line. Make little dash marks very close to your lashline as you slowly move toward the inside. (I don't go all the way to the inside corner because my lashes are blonde and sparse there and it looks weird.) Play around a little and see what looks right for you. Start lightly and darken as you feel more confident; it's easier to add more than try to fix a heavy-handed approach. I tend to go for a subtle look that just makes my lashes look a little thicker and darker. If you want a bolder line, I would start small and build up, or get a thicker pencil. Sue Devitt makes great ones (excellent color selection and easy to use) that also come with the blending spongey thingy.

Another cause of Hooker Eyes (Is that even A THING? Yes, I am declaring it IS.) is too much eyeliner on the top AND bottom. You have options here. I tend to skip the bottom, and apply a little mascara instead. However, if you really feel you need a little somethin' somethin', I'd use the same approach , but focus on the outer corners.

If you're not into pencils, you can always pick up an eyeliner brush (the Sonia Kashuk line at Target has nice options) and dip it into an eyeshadow you like. Follow the same application technique as above. This usually has a softer effect and the color options might be more appealing.

Interested in liquid eyeliner? Um, yeah. You will need to consult someone who can handle it. That stuff is varsity level as far as I'm concerned, and always looks hookerish on me. Sorry.

Best of luck and send pictures of your hot look!

What to Wear Wednesday. Or Something Like That?

It's no secret that I like to tell people what to do and think my official title should be The Boss of You. We can blame it on being an only child for close to 28 years. Or being my mother's daughter.

With some prodding from FraochNiCymru, I am starting up a little advice column...but with a specific purpose. Can you guess what it is?

Well, I'll give you a hint:

Anyone who owns this much lip gloss knows her shit.

And anyone who owns THIS should not be ignored.

I know what you may be thinking. Aren't you the girl perpetually covered in crumbs? Didn't you used to have feathered bangs? And isn't there a picture of you in your high school yearbook sporting a top from Wet Seal with a matching fucking scrunchie? Yes, I will own up to all of the above. Let's just look past all that and move forward, mmmk?

Here is how this works: you send me a fashion or beauty related question and I answer it on Wednesday*. The more details you include, the better chance I have of providing actual help. Simple enough, right? Let's do this! Your questions could be about what to wear for a specific event, the right moisturizer for your skin, or ideas on how to use your new green clutch that doesn't "go" with anything else in your closet. You can email me or leave a question in the comments section.

Hit me with your best shot.



*Why Wednesday? Because it's Hump Day and that cracks me up. Don't look at me like that. This isn't parenting advice or finishing school, OK?

My Favorite Things: What I'm Wearing

There have been some requests for photos of some of my Favorite Things in my wardrobe. It's Monday, I'm bored, and I have a camera. Let's do this!

Chicken Dress: I found this frock at a store here in Chico in their small "vintage" section. It was so 1950's and fun and inexpensive so I snagged it. Why is it called "The Chicken Dress" you ask? Because the pattern features flowers and chickens. Duh. I wore it to church with my grandma and she went crazy over it; I've seen pictures of her back in the day and she was one stylin' fox (how she managed that while wrangling five rambunctious boys I'll never know) so I'm taking that as a compliment. It's not lined and the skirt is see-through so I have to wear a slip with it, which actually makes me feel really proper and all Sandra Dee-ish.

This one's for you, Roadtripper... Please note the classy location for this photo shoot: my bathroom.

Black Boots: My quest for black boots was a complicated one, mostly because I am high-maintenance. I didn't want TOO high of a heel, or TOO pointy of a toe, and I also didn't want something that looked like it was straight out of Herman Munster's closet and I didn't want anything that looked like someone took a Bedazzler to it...my list of demands was ridiculous, really. Luckily DSW came to the rescue with this pair by Bandolino. Hallelujia!

How do I *really* know these are a winner? Gay men gave it the thumbs up.

Anthropologie Skirt: The skirt that made me Anthro's bitch for life. Eight years after its purchase I still wear it as much as possible and receive compliments on the unique style. Sometimes I worry it's a bit much. I mean, it's pretty bright and features sparkles - but if that doesn't describe me, I don't know what does. The material is soft and it makes me feel pretty. So there.

The bright colors! The beading at the bottom! So in love after all these years!

Pashmina Collection: All the haters out there can shut it. Go ahead and argue that pashminas are SO 1998. Whatever. They are cozy and can add some color to a blah outfit. And double as a blankie on an airplane. Magic! These photos should be proof that I have A Problem but they are all used, so I feel OK about that.

Exhibit A: The winter/fall color collection

Exhibit B: The spring/summer collection

Pink Clutch: Elisabeth sent this to me for my birthday one year and I may have actually squealed a little when I unwrapped it. It's completely girly - pink AND sparkly - which is nice for a tomboy like me.

Hello, Lover...

The Super Classy T-Shirt Collection: Lest you think I'm the Queen of England, here's evidence that CKD knows how to rock and roll all night, AND party every day. With, you know, breaks for snacks and napping of course. Probably the best purchases of 1998, really. The "Dick's" shirt is from a burger place in Seattle, hence the tagline "Where TASTE is the difference." I don't wear these shirts out in public anymore, but there was a time when I didn't think twice about sporting them out and about. My mom did not love that phase.

Van Halen, 1980 Invasion. Oh heeeelllll yes!

This shirt is so bright you can probably see it from space. Obviously, it was love at first sight.

I Saw Willie Nelson in Concert. What's New with You?

*Warning: Completely random, disjointed post ahead. Proceed at your own risk of developing ADD right along with me.

Y'all really bring it when it comes to the fashion advice and assurance and I expected nothing less from my fabulous friends. I think this week's resolution to switch it up and step it up (Sounds like a commercial for an exercise video, no? Switch it up! Step it up!) was a success. I was snapped out of my rut by the unseasonably warm weather, of course, and even made small changes like wearing necklaces and eyeshadow. Yes, I understand that most 14 year-old girls can handle that but I think we all know I'M JUST THAT SLOW.

In other news, Coffee Guy's last day at Cal Java was this week. Aloha...and mahalo for the early morning pseudo-flirting. The words "soy latte" will never be the same again.

You know what's kinda fun? Having a friend place bets on how quickly you will get drunk at a party this weekend. You know what makes you feel like a frumpy hag? Discussing body fat percentage and cholesterol levels with said friend.

If given the chance to see Willie Nelson live, do it. Even if you aren't a huge fan or whatever. I was fortunate enough to see him at a small venue, which I think always enhances the exeperience, don't you? Anyway, I have fond memories of listening to his music with my dad on long car rides as a wee girl. It was funny how many of the songs I knew, and he did some pretty fantastic covers of other classics. Plus, the man can jam! Seriously, he wails.

Just Send Stacy and Clinton and We'll Call It Good

Living and working in Chico - particularly at my place of employment - means enjoying a casual life. Maybe too casual. I took a look at myself in the mirror last week and realized, "Sweet Jesus, woman! You have been wearing the same jeans-Old Navy t-shirt-casual shoes-type of outfit for months now! Pull yourself together!" So CKD is trying to have herself a little fashion revolution here...or at least step it up a bit and dress like a grown woman who has a job.

Here's where the plan hits a snag: I am not one of those effortlessly put-together Pretty Ladies whose hair is always in place. And I've tried to rock the tousled bedhead look and have wild, crazy waves and the effect is not so much "Gisele" as it is "hobo." Stabbin' crazy hobo at that. And while I love make up and products, I tend to stick in the neutral range and play it safe. I also do not have oodles of cash to throw at JCrew and Anthropologie, so this new plan needs to happen using what Mama's got in her closet. But I see this as a fun challenge and am excited to get creative. Well as creative as one can be when you own as many black tops as I do. Really, someone should stage an intervention the next time I buy a black shirt. My mom will host it and serve snacks.

If this is going to happen, it's going to need to be baby steps. Because if I try to do some sort of massive, dramatic head-to-toe overhaul I'm going to freak myself out and lose confidence and that sort of defeats the purpose.

Yesterday and today have involved small but noticeable steps towards dressing up a bit without looking ridiculous, and I feel like it is helping to differentiate me from our student workers around here. (Not that they aren't adorable, what with their smooth skin and shiny hair, but one reaches a point where it's ridiculous to dress like a 19 year-old.) And since 2009 is gearing up to be a year of big, fabulous changes it seems like I should have the fabulous look to go with it.

So, Interweb and Pretty Ladies out there...any advice for the fashion-retarded?

My Favorite Things 3: So You're Feeling Broke, Eh?

Seems like most people I know (including myself) have resolved to be a bit more mindful of the finances in 2009. Not uncommon to vow to cut back on the spending right after the holidays, and a lot of us are scaling back on the luxuries in the wake of recession talk and layoffs. But sometimes we need a pick-me-up especially when things are sucky. There are ways to look and feel fabulous without completely depriving yourself. Here are some of the things that help this girl with the champagne taste live the high life on a Pabst Blue Ribbon budget.

Shopping options are limited around here, people, so don't be shocked that everything I buy is from either Target or Trader Joe's.

Side note to the fellas in the house: scroll down to the bottom for something that might interest you. Unless, you know, you care about cosmetics or want to surprise a lady in your life with something fun. Whatevs.

Cover Girl LipSlicks: I know, I know, right? Cover Girl LipSlick? Are we getting ready for the 7th grade dance? Hear me out. Holly Burns over at Nothing But Bonfires turned me onto this stuff in "Daring" and I figured that if I hated it, I was out $3.50 and could always give it to a friend. I have been pleasantly surprised and pleased: natural pink shade with a little shine, doesn't dry out my lips, and I don't have to order it online or trek to a city to find it at Sephora. In fact, I am wearing it right now and damn it if I don't look fantastic. Plus, dude, it's only $3.50!

Maybelline Superstay: Round 2 of "CKD Finds Something Cool Due to Obsessive Reading of Strangers' Blogs and Oh Look! It's Another Goddamn Lipstick Because You Can Never Have Too Many, Right?" I've always wanted to be able to pull off red lipstick but thought that my pasty Irish farmer girl looks meant that was a no-go. Then Maggie Mason of Mighty Goods recommended this stuff in "Wine" and I thought, "Hey, she's kinda pale and has red hair too. Maybe..." Skeptical that a.) I could pull off the red and b.) a $9.49 tube of lipstick would really, truly, seriously last all night, I went for it and am in LOVE. OK, maybe not LOVE but I'd let this stuff get to second base on the first date, no question. I had to scrub and use make-up remover to get it off, so yeah, it really, truly, seriously lasts all night. It does dry out your lips a little, but for under $10 you can get yourself some chapstick, right?

Trader Joe's Purify Tangerine Sugar Scrub: Hot damn, kids, this stuff kicks the ass of all the "fancy" exfoliators and scrubs out there. Trader Joe's never fails to please, and this is no exception. A little bit of this $6.49 miracle scrub goes a long way, which means a tub will last you a long time. A lot of people like salt scrubs, but this delicate flower finds them a bit too harsh. Sugar scrubs smell better (in my opinion) and do the job just as well. (I hear Trader Joe's makes a good salt scrub, too, so if you are a fan of those, give it a whirl. I mean, I'm not the boss of you.) I still have to use lotion since my skin is crazy-dry but you "normal" types could probably forgo that extra step.

Cal Java Coffee: If you bring in your own mug, a cup of coffee at Cal Java costs $1.60. Most days I make my own at home, but every once in awhile I like to go in, chit-chat with the girls behind the counter, and allow Coffee Guy to slip me some extra banana bread (not a euphemism, unfortunately). Speaking of, a moment of silence: this is Coffee Guy's last week at Cal Java and he is moving to Hawaii at the end of the month. CKD is crestfallen, but will soldier on. OK, yes, back to the coffee: $1.60 (and unlimited free refills if you hang out) feels like a small price to pay for some caffeinated goodness and fantastic company. What? No Cal Java near you? Go find your own local roaster to support. I'm betting it will be cheaper AND better than one of the 27 Starbucks in your neighborhood.

Charles Shaw Wine: With the economy in the toilet, we're gonna need some booze, right? As a cheapskate and total lush, I love this stuff. Living in San Francisco, land of the overpriced cocktail and wine snobs, meant that I had to find ways to enjoy some booze without blowing my food and drink budget to hell. Enter Two Buck Chuck. Honorable mentions to Yellow Tail and Barefoot for other low-priced wine options.

Back by Popular Demand

Alternate Titles for this post:

-My Favorite Things 2: Electric Booglaoo (The "Electric Boogaloo" thing will never get old for me in case you were wondering.)
-For the Love of God, You Spend How Much on This Shit?

Alrighty then! Let's do this!

Curl Conscious Creme: My hair is naturally curly, but I spent my adolescence in front of the mirror, round brush and hair dryer in hand, trying to will it into submission. Free from the shackles of my own stupidity, I am embracing the curl and sleeping in. Ah, sweet freedom! But to keep myself out of Carrot Top territory, I get a little help from the good people at Bumble+bumble. I have tried about five different products from various lines and I think I'm in love. Ready to put down the flat iron? Get yourself some of this stuff and prepare to be complimented. They make two types since we all know there are sub-catergories within the curl genre. Duh. Bonus: there's no crunchy-curly hair side effect and no need to blow dry if you're running late.

Never a Dull Moment: The name of this face scrub could describe me. Will she spill water down the front of her top in public? Maybe trip in front of a bunch of construction workers? Or fall asleep at 9pm while watching 90210? Yes, yes, and YES. Unlike other abrasive scrubs, this won't irritate your skin and it even smells nice. Thanks, Origins, for making something for the sensitive skin people of the world. Everyone deserves to exfoliate.

Eye Doctor: I am obsessed with wrinkles, but the idea of Botox or whatever makes me ill. So, I'm going the pre-emptive strike route and have been using eye cream since I was 20. I've tried a few but my favorite so far has been Eye Doctor by Origins. It's on the pricey side, but I like the way it feels and it wears nicely under make-up. I also like the fact that Origins places high importance on recycling, organic goods and sustainable practices. For some reason this enables me to justify the cost. Roll with it.

Dr. Feelgood: This is the kind of thing that makes my father crazy. When asked, "What is that?" I reply, "It's make-up, but you don't look like you're wearing make-up." This makes my dad shake his head, pray that Evan turns out normal and sigh, "THEN DON'T WEAR ANY MAKE-UP! Save yourself some money, too." Oh, Dad, your logic is wasted here. I am BeneFit's bitch: cute packaging and a clever name? I'll take two. This is great for a quick touch-up if you're a little shiny or want to quickly even out your skin tone. Supposedly you can also wear it as a base under foundation, but I've never tried that. If you do, let me know how it works out.

Smashbox Photo Finish: Another shout-out to Elisabeth for introducing me to this wonderful creation. As she put it, "Your face feels like cashmere!" You know what? It does. This is basically primer for your face; put it on before your foundation and the rest of your make-up will go on like velvet.

Coffee: Yes, this is technically a "drug" rather than a product, but the people who had to deal with me that one Lent where I gave up caffeine can attest that I need this. Regular coffee, fancy lattes and cafe au laits, over ice...Mama loves it all. I don't drink it constantly throughout the day, but there's something about my morning routine that requires a cup of coffee. Lately I've been making my own at home, but every once in awhile I treat myself to a soy latte from Cal Java, a local, family owned coffee roaster. And yes, I bring my own travel mug so as to cut down on waste. Calm down, Hippie.

Get shopping so we can be twinsies who smell and look pretty...but have nothing saved for retirement. We'll be the best lookin' ones in the poor house. Isn't that what really matters?

You Can Keep Your Raindrops on Roses

Fun fact: Oprah and I share a birthday. It's not today or anything, but I joke that I should get to be friends with her and score free stuff since I, too, have a list of My Favorite Things. I am a self-proclaimed Product Whore and my bathroom cabinets are a thing to behold. Think of it as a "greatest hits" version of Sephora, Origins, Kiehls and Target. Mama likes to mix it up.

Wearing a uniform from age six to fourteen meant I didn't really discover fashion until rather late in the game. It took me awhile to figure out what actually looks decent on me and find my own style rather than try to emulate someone else...and then get depressed because it didn't look good on me. Sometimes I want to go back in time and reassure teenage me that everything will be OK. Other times I want to tell teenage me to sack up and get over it.

Because I know you care, here are some of My Favorite Things:

Bumble+bumble Sunday Shampoo: Yes, this stuff will set you back but a bottle will last you forever (especially my fellow short-hair types) and this stuff is phenomenal if you suffer from product build up. Use it once a week or so and your product-addled locks will love you. http://www.bumbleandbumble.com/product/spp.tmpl?CATEGORY_ID=CAT57&PRODUCT_ID=219

Cetaphil Gentle Face Wash: I have been using this stuff since I was 12 and swear by it, especially if you have sensitive skin, which I do. Everything makes me break out into a rash except for this stuff. You can find it at any drugstore and it's gentle enough to be used on eye make-up. Who doesn't love something that does double-duty? http://www.cetaphil.com/Products/cleansers.aspx

Purpose Daily Moisturizer SPF 15: Like the Cetaphil, this stuff has been a constant companion of mine since the early 90's. And I am convinced it is the reason I still get carded at the age of 30. And of course, totally safe for you sensitive skin types. http://www.drugstore.com/qxp16594_333181_sespider/purpose/dual_treatment_moisture_lotion_spf_15.htm

Clinique Almost Lipstick in "Black Honey": Universally flattering shade and I gots to send a shout-out to Elisabeth for turning me on to this stuff. A sheer berry color, it looks great on me, Elisabeth, my mom and my stepmom. None of us have remotely similar coloring. Magic! Perfect for day and you can layer a shimmery gloss over it for evening for a little extra somethin' somethin'. http://www.clinique.com/templates/products/sp_shaded.tmpl?CATEGORY_ID=CATEGORY4903&PRODUCT_ID=PROD536

BCBG Black Dress and Red Pashmina, Circa 1999: I bought this dress and wrap as a big splurge for my friend Michelle's wedding ages ago. It has become a go-to in my wardrobe and a "lucky dress" of sorts.* No, not because of that you perv, but because when I wear it to a wedding the couple lives happily ever after (right Michelle? Rico & Beth? B&G?), and you can dance in it all night. This number has seen me through some weight ups-and-downs and I always feel hot in it. Nine years after its initial purchase I still get compliments. Bonus: the fabric cleans beautifully in case you spill red wine on it...not that I would. And I don't care what some trendy magazine says: pashminas are always "in" and red is classic.

Doc Marten Boots, Circa 1993: These shoes were the bane of my friend Kelly's existence. She tried to convince me not to buy them in the middle of Macy's shoe department about a month before sophomore year started. I ignored her pleas of, "Don't do it! They are SO UGLY!" as she held up pair after pair of Timberlands as examples of acceptable boot options. Sorry, Belles. I still have them. I don't wear them every day anymore but they are fabulous for concerts, especially if I want to retire the preppy/girlie look and unleash my inner badass rocker chick. Maybe I'll wear them tomorrow just to keep the crew around here guessing.
http://www.dmusastore.com/pc-43-10-1460.aspx

Anything I Have Ever Purchased from Anthropologie, Ever: Does any of their stuff go out of style? No. Should I own all of it? YES. Especially this sweet little frock: http://www.anthropologie.com/anthro/catalog/productdetail.jsp?_dyncharset=ISO-8859-1&_dynSessConf=-6502152943517591384&id=830045&parentid=APP_DRESS_EMBROIDERED&pushId=APP_DRESS_EMBROIDERED&popId=APP_DRESSES&sortProperties=%2BmarketingPriority%2C-saleDate&navCount=7&navAction=poppushpush&fromCategoryPage=true&selectedProductSize=&selectedProductSize1=&color=ger

So there you go, Interweb. You want to be like me? Here you go. Go forth and buy stuff!


*I have an unlucky red dress which results in the couple separating and/or ending up in counseling weeks after the honeymoon. It has been retired from the wedding rotation.